Monday, December 11, 2006

Actual Lines from Job Ads.

These are direct quotations from employment advertisements that I have encountered in the last month or so.
  • We are an international company with offices in Menlo Park, California and Kyiv, Ukraine.
  • Want to be a part of the digital video revolution?
  • What you bring to the game: An attitude that says, "Never settle for the ordinary."
  • The Managing Editor should have a brain whose synaptic firing could power a favela slum.
  • Are you up on the hottest job market trends? Do you enjoy discussing the latest career news with your friends and family?
  • We don't have any intention of letting go of the reigns [sic] of this Blogging Battlestar Galactica completely, but we figured it's best to start looking for new talent now and empowering them with a venue "all their own!"
Who's getting their resumes ready?


Z said...

Blogging Battlestar Galactica? Sign me the frack up!

Favela? Just had to wikipedia that -- so basically, the primary requirement for this job is that you don't mind them wiring your brain to a Brazilian shanty town? It's like the "Spock's Brain" episode of Star Trek.

(yes, there's two too many nerdly sci-fi references in this comment, but nut-up and deal with it!)

Wouldn't it be frighteningly awesome if these were all from a SINGLE want ad?

hans q. bungle said...

those are great. i really need to look for new jobs every now and then.

pbdotc said...

kill me now

Anonymous said...

fuck you, bourgeoisie.

slskenyon said...

This is a sign that perhaps those people who write these ads should write an ad for their own positions soon for the greater good of the company.

shuna fish lydon said...

this is hysterical.

I wrote about some craigslist ads for my industry-- it is truly amazing what's out there!