You've heard of buzzwords? I'd like to talk about buzz-kill words. These are the words, names or phrases that are the equivalent of cognitive white noise: When you see them, your immediate impulse is to nap, avert your eyes, scroll, press the "Back" button, or do anything other than read further. Here are mine of late:
XML Tutorial
J.T. Leroy
Privacy Policy
Approved Vendors
Kevin Federline
Bush Press Conference
I would welcome additions to this list, or antidotes.
Here's mine:
ReplyDeleteXML [anything]
SBC
SEO
Katie Couric
Facebook
Domino's Brooklyn-Style Pizza
Netroots
CSI: Anywhere
Federline derivitive, "K-Fed"
and on, and on...
Possible antidotes:
add, "Between the Sheets" to buzz-kill words. IMPORTANT: under no circumstances use this antidote with "Kevin Federline" or "K-Fed" (try instead, "Britney Sex Tape" -- though this is more mitigator, and less antidote.)
or try this:
"A [buzz-kill word] says what?" NOTE: with this technique, buzz-kill word must be mumbled so as to elicit a "What?" from your conversation partner.
RSS
ReplyDeleteLance Armstrong
Dane Cook
Lost
Web 2.0
Fashion Essentials
I must shamefully admit that I actually find K-Fed fascinating. Just an incredible little mammal.
Buzzkill:
ReplyDelete- NBA playoff picks
- Teen angst coming out of a 30-something's well-fed pie hole, especially mine
Anti Buzzkill:
- inappropriate comments are the best buzzkill espcially at work
- "I know a one-eyed whore in [wherever Charlie D. Cubicle is bragging about going]. You should look her up."
- "Do you thing this banana looks like a big yellow shlong?"
Wow, these are some GOOD ones. I don't even know what Netroots is but I already don't want to.
ReplyDeletenetroots are the folks that helped win the election. fuck adam nagourney and rahm emanual. well, rahm emanual helped too....
ReplyDeleteI have a new one today: Borat.
ReplyDelete